by Kelvin Chin, Life After Life Expert
Caveat:
The following thoughts are based on my own personal experience with the Other Side over the past 45 years, as well as many conversations with hundreds of my clients who have either had NDE’s (Near-Death Experiences) briefly visiting the Other Side, or who have had communications with dead loved ones on the Other Side.
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I’m often asked this question about what happens to bad people when they die. But, in my opinion, it’s an incomplete question. In addition to wondering what happens to them after they die, we should also ask another very appropriate question: “What happens to bad people when they’re alive?”
Let me explain what I mean by this.
When people are asking what happens to bad people when they die, they are usually interested in seeing if I think punishment or some sort of retribution or after-death consequences are “experienced” or “delivered” to that person by some other entity, force, or God. Often it’s the idea of “judgment” that they are thinking about.
You may have seen my views about punishment in other blogs or in my book, Marcus Aurelius Updated: 21st Century Meditations On Living Life. But I will give you my version here, and then discuss what I meant above by “another appropriate question to ask.”
Punishment to Change Behavior
First of all, most people when they ask the above question presume that punishment is somehow a good way to change behavior. That, whether we’re talking about during life or after death, either when our parents punished us or the criminal justice system punished that “bad guy” — or if God punished “bad people” after they died — many people would think it was a good way to change and improve our behavior.
To “teach us a lesson.”
However, the premise that punishment is somehow a good thing, an effective method, is not based on sociological or psychological fact. It has been factually and scientifically proven many times in studies by experts in those fields that punishment does not change behavior in a positive way. Punishing people does not make them a better person. It may make them more obedient, compliant and fearful, but that does not make them a better functioning, socially well-adjusted, thoughtful and caring, wiser human being who makes better choices. In fact, it could even have the opposite effect.
This sociological and psychological fact about punishment not automatically improving behavior has been known by scientists for many decades. It is not disputed.
I was at a lecture given by the Los Angeles County District Attorney who said the recidivism rate (a person’s relapse into criminal behavior) is somewhere in the 60-80% range nationally — for example, in Los Angeles 64% of those who’ve been sent to jail, then released, are back in jail within 6 months, and fully one-third of those are back in jail within only 3 weeks of being released! So she pointed out, clearly the punishment of merely sending people to jail is not having a positive effect on changing their behavior.
Now, is there a reason to have jails and prisons — that may not be a “punishment-related” reason? I leave that to the sociology experts to ponder and discuss more deeply. But sure, I could see an argument for separating certain individuals who choose to harm others. So perhaps for safety reasons, society may decide to separate them from the masses and put them in jail or prison. That makes perfect logical sense to me. But that’s a very different reason than punishing and expecting them to change their behavior in some positive way merely as a result of the incarceration.
Punishment or Judgment in the Afterlife
And as far as the Afterlife is concerned, most people are asking if there is some automatic “structural” punishment for “bad deed doers.” That is one part of the issue, which I will address first. But can the “consequences” of one’s bad actions still be addressed after one dies in ways that do not involve the need for a structure of punishment? That is a different question from the structural one. I will address that issue second.
Then finally, I will discuss why bad people are cruel in the first place. Why do they “bully”?
Is God as Smart as Humans?
First, structurally, if there is a God (or gods) or beings who are entrusted with the judgment of those who die, one would assume that if there is such a role, they would be at least as smart as all of the human psychologists and sociologists who have done these many hundreds — perhaps thousands — of studies indicating that punishment does not automatically create long-term positive behavioral change. Right? Otherwise, those beings on the Other Side would not be that smart.
Is God Cruel or Loving?
And if those beings in this supposed “Afterlife judgment role” know about all those human socio-psychological studies, yet still are simply doing this “punishment of humans” thing because they like to inflict punishment, then they are not the type of entities I would look up to or respect — never mind “worship.” In fact, “enjoying inflicting unhappiness on another” is my definition of cruelty, which you can read about in my other blogs. So, I would run from them! Not worship them.
I mean, who would want to “worship” a cruel entity?
Okay, I understand that there are some religious leaders who do promote this idea of punishment in the Afterlife, but ask yourself — why do they use fear to push their agenda? Why does anyone use fear to persuade others to believe what they believe?
One word: “control.” What better way to control you than by creating the fear in you that if you don’t believe the way they do, terrible things will happen to you.
My advice: stay away from “control freaks.”
If God is Smart, How Smart?
If there is a God, don’t most people think of him or her as omniscient or at the very least — “very smart”? And if that’s the case, why would a smart person want to even be involved with judging others? Wouldn’t a smart person give those others the freedom to think however they want, to act however they want? Rather than be a puppeteer “pulling the strings” and controlling those people all the time?
Being a puppeteer would seem boring to me. And, moreover, an indication of a “small mind,” a “petty mind” who is sitting around bored lacking creativity, just looking for mischief…again, a “control freak.” Even worse — a bored, control freak.
Just sayin....
So, bottom line, it doesn’t make sense to me that there would be any judgment, judgment of our behavior while we have been humans. It makes no sense for anyone to build that judgment into some structural system. Why would a God figure or others create that to deliver punishment that would have zero effect?
If God is so smart, why would he or she do that?
What purpose would it serve?
Are There Consequences to What We Do?
However, are there consequences to one’s actions — whether good or bad?
Absolutely yes, on this side and the Other Side
Think of it this way. If someone dies and has hurt you in some way, do you think you would ever forget? I don’t think so. We never forget. Period. There is no such thing as “forgive and forget.” Whoever made up that phrase is living in a fantasy.
So, might you run into that same person on the Other Side after you die? That same person who hurt you? Yes, you might. Then you have a choice. You can either avoid them and leave them behind. Or, do you think the victimized hurt person might deliver his/her own consequences to that bully if she or he runs into them on the Other Side? Sure, that might happen.
Bottom line here is to understand that there is no “automatic, structural” punishment system on the Other Side. But that no one does anything without consequences of some sort, either immediately on this side, or delayed to later on the Other Side if they again encounter the victims whom they hurt.
So, yes, there may be consequences to bad people when they die. But they are not delivered by God or some gods through some automatic structure. If they are delivered, they would most likely be delivered by the people they hurt.
God and Free Will
So, if you believe in God (I am not saying I do or don’t…I am just thinking this through logically with you here…), as we have already discussed, don’t you think God would be a smart being? Therefore, if he or she is smart, it is not likely that God would create some ineffective system. (But vengeful human beings might create the idea and tell you that God created it, right?)
But, if God were so smart, wouldn’t he or she give humans the Free Will (individual choice) to do whatever they wanted to do? And if he or she did that, maybe that would be the smartest way to allow the consequences of one’s bad (or good) actions to play out. Letting the people involved in the doing and receiving of those actions — both good and bad — handle the consequences of those actions however they want to.
Doesn’t that sound like a smarter God than one who would punish people full well knowing beforehand that punishment would have zero effect on changing their behavior?
And if you’re wondering how those consequences would get delivered after the bad person died…you must already believe in an Afterlife if you’re even reading this essay. So, the people would meet up in the Afterlife and “duke it out”! Or, if you believe in reincarnation, then they would run into each other again in a future life and they could “duke it out” then. As many times as they wanted to until they both were satisfied.
That would be the Free Will option that makes the most sense to me.
But, what about during the people’s lifetime before the bad person dies?
Here is some further food for thought….
An Appropriate Question to Ask…
“What happens to bad people when they’re alive?”
Consequences and Life Experience
It’s what I consider the more practical and impactful question.
Because I think that consequences for any actions are more immediate than we realize. More immediate than most of us are willing to admit.
If we are candid and honest with ourselves, we have all experienced situations where we “knew inside” that something we may have said or done hurt someone whether we intended to or not. There is a consequence to everything, in other words, a reaction to every action. And it’s those consequences that are our metaphoric “friends and teachers” in life...if we choose to pay attention to them.
It’s simply called “life experience.” No fancy term or catchy tag line needed.
“Bad People” — Why Do Bullies “Bully”?
What most people call “bad people” are those who know what they are doing is wrong or hurtful, yet they do it anyway. That is my definition of cruelty. People who do things that are hurtful to others and know they are hurting others and continue to do it anyway.
Why do they do it? For the same reason we do everything and anything in life — for pleasure, for happiness.
So, ironically, the people who are engaged in such “bad behavior” do it for the same reason that anyone does anything — the pursuit of happiness. On that level, they are just like any of us.
But understanding that, why do they act in a cruel, hurtful way?
Because they are unhappy, they are insecure.
Bullies lack self-confidence. They feel smaller than others, weaker inside than others — even if they’re big physically and even if they are strong physically, they are weak internally.
So the only way the bullies can feel happier and stronger than others is to make those around them feel more unhappy and more insecure than they (the bullies) feel. And thus — by acting in a cruel, demeaning, pushy way — the bully feels better because he’s made other people around him feel worse than he feels.
Inside the Bully
But, let’s get back to the “bad behavior” and talk about the internal effect of it on the bully.
Does the bully realize what he or she is doing when they’re doing it? It depends. Sometimes they may if they’re in a more conscious moment, and other times they may not if they’re completely swept away with the actions that they’re engaged in at the time.
However, I think that almost all minds are conscious and self-aware enough to realize that upon reflection, they are hurting someone. Inside, the person most likely feels inadequate. They may mask it by puffing up their chest, so to speak, and acting in a very authoritative, blustery kind of way, but inside they know how they feel. They would never admit it externally to the world, but internally they know they feel deficient. There is a lack. The yearning to be accepted, to be loved is ever-present, but due to a lack of emotional intelligence they have no idea how to gain that love other than by pushiness, or “ordering others” in order to garner some degree of reverence that is mostly based on fear. This make them feel better as they then feel more important, more secure than the weaker people they’ve now surrounded themselves with.
So, in a sense, the bully is faced all the time with their own weakness, their own inadequacy, whenever they act in a bullying, cruel way towards others. That’s what I mean by the effect or the reaction to their action is more immediate than we may realize. They suffer immediately. And constantly. The more conscious the bully is, the more they suffer. The more frequently.
So in that way, if you want to call it consequence or punishment or simply the effect of their actions, the bully experiences all of that more immediately the more conscious they are.
And the more conscious they are, the less likely they will be to continue to inflict that sort of suffering on themselves. They will look for an alternative. They may actually realize that strengthening themselves “from the inside out” is a more effective way to pursue happiness.
They may begin to realize that surrounding themselves with weaker people than they are is not so great a “universe” to live in. That surrounding oneself with slaves who are weaker than you — who simply do your bidding — may be fun at first, but gets pretty boring fast. It’s not a long-term solution — for even the bully.
Final Thoughts
Now I realize, because I’m a realist and a pragmatist, that this last idea we’ve been discussing is very much a long term proposition for most bullies to embrace. Most bullies will choose the short-term fix. They will choose to be cruel and push weaker people around to make those people even weaker so that the bully feels stronger and better inside about himself. But even that feeling of security is only temporary for the bully.
So you see, that’s what I meant when I said the more appropriate question is “How does the bad person live their life now”?
Because I think the answer is — the bully does not live his life so well. Not very happily. And at an expense — by hurting others in order to be happy — which may eventually be too great an expense for even the bully over time.
That said, if you don’t like that answer about bullying, you can still consider my earlier thoughts on “consequences” to the bad deed doer always being available to the victim to deliver — whether on this side, the Other Side, or in a future lifetime. That option is always on the table, in my opinion. The victim never forgets. And the victim never loses the opportunity to deliver consequences to the bad person, even when one or both of them are biologically dead.
Kelvin H. Chin is a Meditation Teacher, Life After Life Expert, and Author of “Overcoming the Fear of Death.” He learned to meditate at age 19, and has been teaching Turning Within and coaching others in their self-growth for 40 years. He helps people understand their life challenges through their individual belief systems, and helps them find their own solutions. His past life memories reach back many centuries, and he accesses those memories in his teaching and his coaching in the same way all coaches draw on their own available experiences for perspective and effective analogies. He can be reached at www.OvercomingTheFearOfDeath.org or www.TurningWithin.org.